Quote:
Originally Posted by DenverSteve
You don't "handle" it. You let others live as they choose. There is no benefit to you, or them, to judge them on how they choose to live their lives. Half the problems in our country are those who want their freedoms but choose to stick their noses in other peoples business. My advice is to stay in your lane and let others do the same. As long as their decisions don't interfere with your ability to live your life, leave them alone. Like Chapperss articulately said.
p.s. - I am in my early 60's and a long-distance cyclist/racer. I am 6' and 175 pounds and get the same questions as mentioned above. "Are you losing weight?", "Are you okay?" "You're too thin"..... I just say no and move along. I work my tail off many hours a day and don't care what anyone else chooses to do. The time it would take me to interfere in someone else's life choices just takes away from my peace and calm.
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Yes, its simplest to do that. And it's a failsafe way to ensure you don't tread on anyone's toes.
But this thread is specifically about friends and family; people we care about and would normally have open dialogue with. To me asking a friend/family member if they are ok, or need support or help etc is part of my duty of care to them.
I know fine that a large part of the reason that I'm currently unhealthy is because I'm not in a good place mentally. My self-medication is to eat junk food. Clearly that does more harm than good, but that's what happens. I eat when I'm depressed, I eat when I'm stressed, I eat when I'm bored... I don't intend to, but that's where my brain goes.
So if/when a friend says to me that I'm not looking so healthy, is everything ok? My response is that I'm not doing so well, and I could really do with getting out on my bike or whatever with them. I don't feel the need to take offence at their judgement of my physical state, because I know that their entire intention is to help.
That said, if I were to ask that question to one of my friends and their response was no I'm fine, I'd let them be. I'm not out to try and get everyone around me to chase my ideals.