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there are boundaries parents and in laws should never crossed, 1. how you are raising your kids. 2. your house, rearranging furniture, telling you what to do in your own house.
out of respect, ask first if its ok to do so.
not knowing your boundaries, will create alot of issues, and fights with your spouse.
I have to say my mother in law is great and doesnt get involve but my mother that was whole different scenario. I had many issues with my mother wanting to control me, my wife and how things were done. My mistake was trying to make excuses, lead to arguments because I couldnt confront my own mother. It will only get complicated when you have kids...I havent had contact with my family for 2yrs now. I will not backed down until they realize what they did was wrong.
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