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      10-21-2008, 01:40 PM   #1
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Craiglist post... awesome!

ntitled "I hate you all"

this was pretty awesome when i read it:



I don't care what colour you are. I don't care where you're from. I don't care what you do for a living. I don't care what class you are, how you dress, what you smoke or drink or who you know or whom you've fucked.

I hate you all. I hate every last living, breathing, snot and feces producing, promiscuously copulating, celebrity obsessed, opinionated one of you. From right here in Orange County right around the planet and back, coast to coast, nationwide and internationally. Every! Single! Last! One! Of! You!

Fuck love. Fuck your insipid grasping at some abstract concept of chemical imbalances and reasonless actions, fumbling around in the crowd trying to find some cinematic supposition for real human interaction. Fuck lust too. Fuck you all, from the lowlife dirtbags that think desperate 'nice guys' who never get the girl due to a total lack of testosterone grown stones. Fuck you all, from the crazy, under dressed sluts that judge a persons character by the price of their shirt, right down to the fat, flabby chicks that think personality is enough.

Fuck you drivers, for thinking that a yellow light is a sign that says 'step on the gas'. Fuck you wheelmen and women that think it's okay to sit in a left hand turn in the middle of morning traffic, even though there is a protected left in the intersections before and after where you need to make your turn. Fuck you too cyclists - you're not exempt from the traffic laws just because your peddling, you miserable spandex covered neon reflective fucks. Fuck you too, pedestrians. Use the fucking crosswalk if you don't want to get hit, and use it before the little countdown clock says '3'. You don't have enough goddamn time to lope across four lanes of traffic.

Fuck you chick on your cellphone. Fuck you attitude packed minimum-wager that makes my coffee. Fuck you cops that spend all their time handing out speeding tickets. Fuck you douche bag doing ten over the limit in the passing lane on the highway. Fuck you lady using exact change at the counter at the grocery store. Fuck you kids having a conversation in the doorway. And fuck you also for not getting the fuck out of your designated handicapped seat when a pregnant or elderly person gets on the fucking bus.

Fuck taxes. Fuck welfare. Fuck the whole selfish, over politicized and party driven government system. I'm sick and fucking tired of policies and new laws with seven hundred bylaws that nobody but you and your cabinet reads. Fuck you councilors and your stupid 'district improvement' plans. Fuck you unions, for asking for so much and giving nothing more that what you already give. Fuck the whole process that allows people who are supposed to be working for us work for interests that only benefit the next campaign. Fuck your short-sightedness, your rush to the bandwagons, and your incessant arguing over fuck all. Fuck the parties, fuck the conventions, and fuck your campaigns. Do some real fucking work for a change.

Fuck you bottles of water. You're water. You're not worth two fucking dollars.
Fuck you trendsetters, fuck you fashionistas. Fuck your little dogs and and your idiotic outfits. Fuck your high heels in the snow. Fuck your five dollar coffees and your fifteen dollar veggie burgers. Fuck your health kick, your diet or your fucking new interest in kickboxing or sushi.

Fuck your culture. Fuck your race. Fuck your sense of entitlement. Fuck your sense of uniqueness. Fuck you all for the belief that you have something unique and interesting to contribute. Fuck you for filling the internet with your useless garbage. Fuck your blogs, your wikis, your forums. Fuck your name calling. And most of all, fuck whatever you believe. It's all wrong. Fuck it.

Fuck your complaints. Fuck your addictions. Fuck your dependencies. Fuck your pain. Fuck your tears. Fuck selling whatever it is you sell. Fuck your manipulation of others. Fuck movies. Fuck fucking. Fuck everything you own. Fuck your allergies. Fuck your stupid commons sense. Fuck your spelling and fuck your lack of education, or your ignorance, whatever is applicable.

I don't give a fuck. Shut the fuck up and just get on with it.

Last edited by !Xoible; 10-21-2008 at 02:02 PM..
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      10-21-2008, 01:54 PM   #2
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Holy FUCK.... Someone's having a bad day. These are the kind of people who decide to go postal.....
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      10-21-2008, 01:56 PM   #3
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Word Count : 714

Character Count : 3,439

"Fuck" & "Fucking" Word Count : 70

Hate Ratio (use of "Fuck/ fucking" divided by total word count) : 9.90% x 10 (decency factor) = 99%


Why all the "FUCKING" hate?
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      10-21-2008, 01:58 PM   #4
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nah i think he's just chilling fucking around online... probably just had a joint or some shit haha
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      10-21-2008, 02:03 PM   #5
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Sounds like a rip-off from the scene in 25th Hour.
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      10-21-2008, 02:06 PM   #6
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in my opinion this guy or girl needs to actually FUCK something..
blow off some stress thats a lot of hate.. yet its creative..

makes me feel a little angry when im done readin it..

but i did enjoy
"Fuck you douche bag doing ten over the limit in the passing lane on the highway."

and can we broaden the
"Fuck you cops that spend all their time handing out speeding tickets."
to FUCK COPS in general.. (hope ur a cop and reading this) :finger:
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      10-21-2008, 02:17 PM   #7
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This just made my day lol I guess he just had too much fucking time in his hand.
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      10-21-2008, 02:22 PM   #8
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Right back at cha
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      10-21-2008, 02:28 PM   #9
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fuck completely lost its meaning halfway through reading that. lol i rike it
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      10-21-2008, 02:48 PM   #10
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this reminds me of something i found on dallas craigslist a few months ago. i laughed so hard i saved it....

I'm absolutely fed up with you people. Well at least 90% of you. Yes, you, the person in the left lane going 5MPH under the limit while the people behind you are getting extremely irate. You, the one that doesn't ever use your turn signal for anything except your state inspection. You, the one with the cell phone plastered to your ear not paying attention to anything that you're doing. You, the teenage driver that thinks that you own the road. You, the old lady that can't even see over the steering wheel. And lastly, you, the Dallas taxicab driver. If you are any of these, you suck.

Here are some tips for the aforementioned people above...
1. If you drive the speed limit or less everywhere you go and wouldn't dare think of breaking the law, stay the hell out of the left lane. It wasn't designed for you. Have you ever noticed those signs on the side of the highway that say "LEFT LANE FOR PASSING ONLY" in real big letters? Well next time you're out for a leisurely drive, look for it. Its on every multi-lane highway in the US.
2. If you see people passing you on the right while they are grinding their teeth, you should automatically know that you are in the wrong place. GET OVER! Its not cool to impede the flow of traffic and you're not being Dudley Doright by doing so. You're only making it a lot more dangerous for everyone else trying to get places.
3. Since were still on the left lane, if you drive a taxi, stay out of the left lane completely. You taxi drivers are well known in many circles as being the worst drivers in Dallas beating out soccer moms and old people by a significant margin. I'll also throw drivers of underpowered cars (Kia, Hyundai, Suzuki, Prius, etc.) in the same category. Some people are trying to get places and your hamster-powered car in the left lane isn't helping.
4. If you are on a 2-lane road and you have a convoy of cars behind you and nothing but open road in front of you, they make the median wide enough so you can get over and let people by safely. Plenty of people do it every day without death or property damage, I'm sure you'll be just fine.
5. Teenagers: no matter what you think or your friends tell you, you suck at driving. Your parents are idiots for buying you a fast car or an SUV. You have very poor situational awareness with your lack of driving experience, not to mention deficient maturity. You will probably never be a Michael Schumacher and 16 years old is not the time to start trying to be.
6. Cell phones. The scourge of American roadways. Why every state hasn't adopted the no cell phones while driving law just blows my mind away. When you're yacking away on the phone, you are not paying attention to the road. When you're writing an email on your BlackBerry while driving in 2 lanes, you should automatically know that you're being an idiot. But you don't. Hang up and drive or get one of those obnoxious bluetooth headsets. At least then you'll have your head up and paying more attention, hopefully.
7. Your turn signal is not decoration. It is meant to be used every time you change lanes or plan to execute a turn. This will save the rest of those people you share the road with unnecessary trips to the brake shop or body shop.
8. If you think you might be too old to drive, you probably are. I know that you're probably not reading this because you've never turned a computer on, but if you have parents or grandparents that you know pose a danger to people on the road because of their degenerative motor skills, perhaps its time to take the keys away. If your elders drive a Towncar, Grand Marquis, or a Crown Victoria, its probably that time. Ancient drivers aren't just annoying, their EXTREMELY dangerous. We've all been cut off by one a few too many times.
9. GET INSURANCE. If you can't afford it, you don't need to be driving. Period, end of story.
10. I really don't understand why there isn't a minimum IQ-based test before the issuance of a driver's license. Some of you are really just too stupid to drive and that translates into your driving ability.

If you are unsure if any of this is you, just count how many times you get honked at or brights flashed at you in a week. I think that's a fair barometer. If you don't get honked at all, you probably pass the test. If you have been honked at in the past week, even once, you fail the test. Take the free advice I'm giving you above and save the rest of us a trip to the shrink.

On another note, I'm actually glad gas prices are so high right now, because its helping to thin the herd out a little. I don't really enjoy paying an arm and a leg to fill up my tank either, but I do enjoy other people driving less. That means there is less of a chance I will run into you, Mr. or Miss bad Dallas driver. Enjoy the rest of your day, and please, stay out of my way.

Sincerely,
Fed up Dallas motorist
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      10-21-2008, 02:49 PM   #11
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oh and it was titled "an open letter to bad dallas drivers." if you've ever driven here, it makes perfect sense.
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      10-21-2008, 02:53 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bimmer Loyalist View Post
fuck completely lost its meaning halfway through reading that. lol i rike it
Fuck lost its meaning on the internet long ago.
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      10-21-2008, 02:58 PM   #13
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LMAO!

I know I have days I feel like this guy. What a great way to vent.
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      10-21-2008, 03:59 PM   #14
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Here in Florida we have lots of considerate drivers who always use there turn signal. In fact some of them have had them on since they left Ohio five years ago.
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      10-21-2008, 04:00 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by louz4 View Post
Here in Florida we have lots of considerate drivers who always use there turn signal. In fact some of them have had them on since they left Ohio five years ago.
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      10-21-2008, 05:03 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blakepilot View Post
this reminds me of something i found on dallas craigslist a few months ago. i laughed so hard i saved it....

I'm absolutely fed up with you people. Well at least 90% of you. Yes, you, the person in the left lane going 5MPH under the limit while the people behind you are getting extremely irate. You, the one that doesn't ever use your turn signal for anything except your state inspection. You, the one with the cell phone plastered to your ear not paying attention to anything that you're doing. You, the teenage driver that thinks that you own the road. You, the old lady that can't even see over the steering wheel. And lastly, you, the Dallas taxicab driver. If you are any of these, you suck.

Here are some tips for the aforementioned people above...
1. If you drive the speed limit or less everywhere you go and wouldn't dare think of breaking the law, stay the hell out of the left lane. It wasn't designed for you. Have you ever noticed those signs on the side of the highway that say "LEFT LANE FOR PASSING ONLY" in real big letters? Well next time you're out for a leisurely drive, look for it. Its on every multi-lane highway in the US.
2. If you see people passing you on the right while they are grinding their teeth, you should automatically know that you are in the wrong place. GET OVER! Its not cool to impede the flow of traffic and you're not being Dudley Doright by doing so. You're only making it a lot more dangerous for everyone else trying to get places.
3. Since were still on the left lane, if you drive a taxi, stay out of the left lane completely. You taxi drivers are well known in many circles as being the worst drivers in Dallas beating out soccer moms and old people by a significant margin. I'll also throw drivers of underpowered cars (Kia, Hyundai, Suzuki, Prius, etc.) in the same category. Some people are trying to get places and your hamster-powered car in the left lane isn't helping.
4. If you are on a 2-lane road and you have a convoy of cars behind you and nothing but open road in front of you, they make the median wide enough so you can get over and let people by safely. Plenty of people do it every day without death or property damage, I'm sure you'll be just fine.
5. Teenagers: no matter what you think or your friends tell you, you suck at driving. Your parents are idiots for buying you a fast car or an SUV. You have very poor situational awareness with your lack of driving experience, not to mention deficient maturity. You will probably never be a Michael Schumacher and 16 years old is not the time to start trying to be.
6. Cell phones. The scourge of American roadways. Why every state hasn't adopted the no cell phones while driving law just blows my mind away. When you're yacking away on the phone, you are not paying attention to the road. When you're writing an email on your BlackBerry while driving in 2 lanes, you should automatically know that you're being an idiot. But you don't. Hang up and drive or get one of those obnoxious bluetooth headsets. At least then you'll have your head up and paying more attention, hopefully.
7. Your turn signal is not decoration. It is meant to be used every time you change lanes or plan to execute a turn. This will save the rest of those people you share the road with unnecessary trips to the brake shop or body shop.
8. If you think you might be too old to drive, you probably are. I know that you're probably not reading this because you've never turned a computer on, but if you have parents or grandparents that you know pose a danger to people on the road because of their degenerative motor skills, perhaps its time to take the keys away. If your elders drive a Towncar, Grand Marquis, or a Crown Victoria, its probably that time. Ancient drivers aren't just annoying, their EXTREMELY dangerous. We've all been cut off by one a few too many times.
9. GET INSURANCE. If you can't afford it, you don't need to be driving. Period, end of story.
10. I really don't understand why there isn't a minimum IQ-based test before the issuance of a driver's license. Some of you are really just too stupid to drive and that translates into your driving ability.

If you are unsure if any of this is you, just count how many times you get honked at or brights flashed at you in a week. I think that's a fair barometer. If you don't get honked at all, you probably pass the test. If you have been honked at in the past week, even once, you fail the test. Take the free advice I'm giving you above and save the rest of us a trip to the shrink.

On another note, I'm actually glad gas prices are so high right now, because its helping to thin the herd out a little. I don't really enjoy paying an arm and a leg to fill up my tank either, but I do enjoy other people driving less. That means there is less of a chance I will run into you, Mr. or Miss bad Dallas driver. Enjoy the rest of your day, and please, stay out of my way.

Sincerely,
Fed up Dallas motorist
+1
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      10-21-2008, 05:18 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blakepilot View Post
this reminds me of something i found on dallas craigslist a few months ago. i laughed so hard i saved it....

I'm absolutely fed up with you people. Well at least 90% of you. Yes, you, the person in the left lane going 5MPH under the limit while the people behind you are getting extremely irate. You, the one that doesn't ever use your turn signal for anything except your state inspection. You, the one with the cell phone plastered to your ear not paying attention to anything that you're doing. You, the teenage driver that thinks that you own the road. You, the old lady that can't even see over the steering wheel. And lastly, you, the Dallas taxicab driver. If you are any of these, you suck.

Here are some tips for the aforementioned people above...
1. If you drive the speed limit or less everywhere you go and wouldn't dare think of breaking the law, stay the hell out of the left lane. It wasn't designed for you. Have you ever noticed those signs on the side of the highway that say "LEFT LANE FOR PASSING ONLY" in real big letters? Well next time you're out for a leisurely drive, look for it. Its on every multi-lane highway in the US.
2. If you see people passing you on the right while they are grinding their teeth, you should automatically know that you are in the wrong place. GET OVER! Its not cool to impede the flow of traffic and you're not being Dudley Doright by doing so. You're only making it a lot more dangerous for everyone else trying to get places.
3. Since were still on the left lane, if you drive a taxi, stay out of the left lane completely. You taxi drivers are well known in many circles as being the worst drivers in Dallas beating out soccer moms and old people by a significant margin. I'll also throw drivers of underpowered cars (Kia, Hyundai, Suzuki, Prius, etc.) in the same category. Some people are trying to get places and your hamster-powered car in the left lane isn't helping.
4. If you are on a 2-lane road and you have a convoy of cars behind you and nothing but open road in front of you, they make the median wide enough so you can get over and let people by safely. Plenty of people do it every day without death or property damage, I'm sure you'll be just fine.
5. Teenagers: no matter what you think or your friends tell you, you suck at driving. Your parents are idiots for buying you a fast car or an SUV. You have very poor situational awareness with your lack of driving experience, not to mention deficient maturity. You will probably never be a Michael Schumacher and 16 years old is not the time to start trying to be.
6. Cell phones. The scourge of American roadways. Why every state hasn't adopted the no cell phones while driving law just blows my mind away. When you're yacking away on the phone, you are not paying attention to the road. When you're writing an email on your BlackBerry while driving in 2 lanes, you should automatically know that you're being an idiot. But you don't. Hang up and drive or get one of those obnoxious bluetooth headsets. At least then you'll have your head up and paying more attention, hopefully.
7. Your turn signal is not decoration. It is meant to be used every time you change lanes or plan to execute a turn. This will save the rest of those people you share the road with unnecessary trips to the brake shop or body shop.
8. If you think you might be too old to drive, you probably are. I know that you're probably not reading this because you've never turned a computer on, but if you have parents or grandparents that you know pose a danger to people on the road because of their degenerative motor skills, perhaps its time to take the keys away. If your elders drive a Towncar, Grand Marquis, or a Crown Victoria, its probably that time. Ancient drivers aren't just annoying, their EXTREMELY dangerous. We've all been cut off by one a few too many times.
9. GET INSURANCE. If you can't afford it, you don't need to be driving. Period, end of story.
10. I really don't understand why there isn't a minimum IQ-based test before the issuance of a driver's license. Some of you are really just too stupid to drive and that translates into your driving ability.

If you are unsure if any of this is you, just count how many times you get honked at or brights flashed at you in a week. I think that's a fair barometer. If you don't get honked at all, you probably pass the test. If you have been honked at in the past week, even once, you fail the test. Take the free advice I'm giving you above and save the rest of us a trip to the shrink.

On another note, I'm actually glad gas prices are so high right now, because its helping to thin the herd out a little. I don't really enjoy paying an arm and a leg to fill up my tank either, but I do enjoy other people driving less. That means there is less of a chance I will run into you, Mr. or Miss bad Dallas driver. Enjoy the rest of your day, and please, stay out of my way.

Sincerely,
Fed up Dallas motorist
that was poetry.
Quote:
Originally Posted by UltimateBMW View Post
Fuck lost its meaning on the internet long ago.
fuckin' right.
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      10-21-2008, 09:18 PM   #18
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He certainly is in touch with his anger or he forgot to take his medication this morning.
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      10-21-2008, 10:16 PM   #19
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y don't u post something more interesting for us, Jew...


i stopped reading after first sentence
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      10-21-2008, 10:40 PM   #20
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y don't u post something more interesting for us, Jew...


i stopped reading after first sentence
Jew? Man that might get you killed
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      10-21-2008, 10:41 PM   #21
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Jew? Man that might get you killed

haha he calls me chink i call him Jew..
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      10-21-2008, 10:59 PM   #22
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made my night. good find.
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