Confess here

Dang3r · 05-21-2021, 07:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esteban

What works for me is to immerse myself in to a new pet. I've mentioned it here before that when I lose a pet I try to get another right away so I don't think about the one I just lost because it hurts. Gets my mind immediately in to something new. Can remember the one I lost when it doesn't hurt anymore, and then remember the good times.

You know, one of my two budgies is already 15.5 yo and thats a very fair age for such a small animal. I am realistic enough to imagine, that his last lap is maybe already set on the lane, but I refuse this thinking even I know that I better should prepared for the moment, when hes off his swing and lay down bottom into the sand.
The second one turns 14yo this June and from today I couldnt say, which one would be go forever first, but thats for me not the point. Those two budgies would be definitely the last ones into my life, I cant stand this powerless feeling no longer to loose someone after such a long time and it bites me more than I would allow that. Even I know that those pets are normally hold as pairwise, this time the remaining one has to go his last walks alone or the spiral never would stop.
Perhaps when I retire I would give a new pet a try, but then a dog, who knows...

1MOREMOD · 05-21-2021, 07:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esteban

What works for me is to immerse myself in to a new pet. I've mentioned it here before that when I lose a pet I try to get another right away so I don't think about the one I just lost because it hurts. Gets my mind immediately in to something new. Can remember the one I lost when it doesn't hurt anymore, and then remember the good times.

Sounds like a poor way to deal with emotions. Like women who monkey branch between relationships instead of actually dealing with things. Also feels like a betrayal to the dog that just passed but that's me.

nyalpine90 · 05-21-2021, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

sorry for your loss,

Joekerr · 05-21-2021, 09:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

Ahh, sorry to hear that - that will be really tough for the next little while, remember the good times you guys shared!

cmyx6go · 05-21-2021, 09:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

So sorry

M5Rick · 05-21-2021, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

Sorry to hear that, our last dachshund Jasper passed away at 14 years old two years ago.

CamasM3e93 · 05-21-2021, 09:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2one3E90

WHY TF?

The value on the early Boxters have come up 50-100% in the last 15 months but I bought mine in Feb 2020 for 8k and it had 90k miles. (One like that runs about 15k now) Mine was in great condition but had the invariable quirks of a 20 year old car. The Boxter drives like a go-cart, certainly slower than the NA M3 but more nimble. I also enjoyed the manual 5 speed more than the DCT, but I think the DCT is a better choice for the M3. I know those are fighting words for some people but if you're using the DCT with manual shifting it really puts an exotic feel on the driving experience and gets the most out of the S65 engine. That's an opinion, it's mine, and I know others see it differently.

That said, there was a certain magic of driving a Porsche engineered car at its limits, knowing if something happened to it I could just walk away from the experience financially. It's a certain freedom that coupled well with the ride.

Much like moving home after 5 years on the east coast - I sold the Boxter too soon and didn't get it out of my system.

1MOREMOD · 05-21-2021, 10:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

Always hard. Sorry to hear.

Esteban · 05-21-2021, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

Sounds like a poor way to deal with emotions. Like women who monkey branch between relationships instead of actually dealing with things. Also feels like a betrayal to the dog that just passed but that's me.

Don't see it that way at all. This is your pet you just lost, not a relationship ending with a woman and you're looking to rebound. Not even close to being the same. No reason to torture yourself. Make it as easy as you can. You're not being disloyal to the pet that passed because you're not suffering in pain because they just died. No reason to unnecessarily hurt when you don't have to. It's wrong to think you're betraying that pet. You're not. It's a fresh wound, let it heal. After it heals, you will have the rest of your life to fondly remember that pet.

King Rudi · 05-21-2021, 11:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

So sorry to hear. I wish that I had some words of encouragement.

Tommy-G · 05-21-2021, 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Just had to put my dog down. 17 year old Border Collie I picked out as a puppy. Gonna miss my buddy.

So sorry for your loss. There is no love as great as an animals....It's never easy

Joekerr · 05-21-2021, 12:29 PM

I'm starting to realize I'm getting old. My neighbour came over for a cigar and some scotch...we wrapped it up at 1am with about 4 scotches each and I did not feel good this morning.

My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.

Dpc2u · 05-21-2021, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I'm starting to realize I'm getting old. My neighbour came over for a cigar and some scotch...we wrapped it up at 1am with about 4 scotches each and I did not feel good this morning.

My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.

I was 18 when you were born and still don't act my age.

Now.... Get off my lawn!

:

cmyx6go · 05-21-2021, 12:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I'm starting to realize I'm getting old. My neighbour came over for a cigar and some scotch...we wrapped it up at 1am with about 4 scotches each and I did not feel good this morning.

My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.

GET OFF MY LAWN! I confess I'll be 58 this weekend. 50 freakin 8?!?!?! I just can't get my arms around that number. It's blowing my mind.

Esteban · 05-21-2021, 01:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I'm starting to realize I'm getting old. My neighbour came over for a cigar and some scotch...we wrapped it up at 1am with about 4 scotches each and I did not feel good this morning.

My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.

GET OFF MY LAWN! I confess I'll be 58 this weekend. 50 freakin 8?!?!?! I just can't get my arms around that number. It's blowing my mind.

Youngster. lol

Happy early birthday, cmyx6go!

rebekahb · 05-21-2021, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.

Nah, that's boring.

cmyx6go · 05-21-2021, 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esteban

Youngster. lol

Happy early birthday, cmyx6go!

Thank you!

King Rudi · 05-21-2021, 02:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I'm starting to realize I'm getting old. My neighbour came over for a cigar and some scotch...we wrapped it up at 1am with about 4 scotches each and I did not feel good this morning.

My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.

I'll be 45 in a few months. I've realized recently that I have hit that age where I am starting to mentally age in reverse. I will also say that my days of drinking til 1:00 a.m. are over.

1MOREMOD · 05-21-2021, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Esteban

Don't see it that way at all. This is your pet you just lost, not a relationship ending with a woman and you're looking to rebound. Not even close to being the same. No reason to torture yourself. Make it as easy as you can. You're not being disloyal to the pet that passed because you're not suffering in pain because they just died. No reason to unnecessarily hurt when you don't have to. It's wrong to think you're betraying that pet. You're not. It's a fresh wound, let it heal. After it heals, you will have the rest of your life to fondly remember that pet.

Okay difference of opinion i don't think the way to deal with any emotions is to cover them up with something else. That's just a denial stage rather than acceptance and getting thru.

Esteban · 05-21-2021, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD

Okay difference of opinion i don't think the way to deal with any emotions is to cover them up with something else. That's just a denial stage rather than acceptance and getting thru.

Not covering up anything. Waiting till it doesn't hurt as bad. Done it with a few of my pets and have wonderful memories.

1MOREMOD · 05-21-2021, 02:59 PM

Points missed. Not facing your emotion is denial. You're supposed to feel bad. Does it only apply to pets, can you cover up other emotions with liquor or drugs and so on. Natural grieving process doesn't involve finding some way not to feel. But maybe I'm just different.

Esteban · 05-21-2021, 03:07 PM

That's your opinion and you're entitled to it. I am as well. Also, I don't have a problem with women, drugs, or alcohol. Do you? Sounds like you might be projecting.

There's no such universal process or staging of grieving and it was never intended to be prescriptive. There's no right or wrong way to do it, especially when being judged by some guy on a forum.

I was offering my personal experience and trying to give some comfort to the member who lost their dog. Not telling people they're 'doing it wrong.'

05-21-2021, 12:29 PM	#5512
Joekerr Banned 7931 Rep 1,923 Posts Drives: 2017 Audi S6 Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Toronto, ON iTrader: (0)	I'm starting to realize I'm getting old. My neighbour came over for a cigar and some scotch...we wrapped it up at 1am with about 4 scotches each and I did not feel good this morning. My 40th is happening this year, might have to start acting my age.
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05-21-2021, 02:59 PM	#5521
1MOREMOD - 11817 Rep 23,187 Posts Drives: Race car-> Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: check your mirrors iTrader: (5)	Points missed. Not facing your emotion is denial. You're supposed to feel bad. Does it only apply to pets, can you cover up other emotions with liquor or drugs and so on. Natural grieving process doesn't involve finding some way not to feel. But maybe I'm just different.
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05-21-2021, 03:07 PM	#5522
Esteban Major General 43984 Rep 7,224 Posts Drives: a slow car fast Join Date: Jun 2014 Location: SoCal iTrader: (0)	That's your opinion and you're entitled to it. I am as well. Also, I don't have a problem with women, drugs, or alcohol. Do you? Sounds like you might be projecting. There's no such universal process or staging of grieving and it was never intended to be prescriptive. There's no right or wrong way to do it, especially when being judged by some guy on a forum. I was offering my personal experience and trying to give some comfort to the member who lost their dog. Not telling people they're 'doing it wrong.' Last edited by Esteban; 05-21-2021 at 05:18 PM..
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