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      09-13-2018, 05:18 PM   #67
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Originally Posted by Chappers 71 View Post
Cheers Anna I didn't mean to bring your thread down, however just posting that has made me feel better, so thank you.
Roy
Hell no! I ot all threads I'm in and expect no less from others!

This is a community and I think we who have formed friendships here have done so for reasons. If this is the community we share our serious shit and the lighter side too, then you get what you give and I've always gained a lot.

I'll pm you with my second cup of coffee and you go and slap that stupid thought of you diverting this bs thread out of your head before that, Roy.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-13-2018, 05:31 PM   #68
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I keep insisting I'll blog this project of mine, but obviously I'm not going to so I thought I could make a thread about how not to renovate a house.

If anyone has missed, I'm a fucking idiot. If there is a way to make life harder for myself, I'll do it.

I've been shopping for a house for a year now again, nothing felt right. I made a bid in one and it got accepted but I just couldn't find the motivation for it. It was too new, it had straight corners, it had a roof that wasn't leaking. Obviously it wasn't for me, I truly tried but I just couldn't buy it.

A few months ago my aunt told me she wants to sell my great aunts home. It has busted windows, no heating, the house has to be basically redone from top to bottom and my husband hates it, my kids try to grow up faster so they can have me sent to a mental institution, my dog refuses to go near the place...

Anyway, I got some bids from excavator contractors and after reviewing them I decided those fuckers are highway robbers and now I'm stuck digging by hand 8 ft under ground by hand for about 250ft. While doing that, I managed to get a tree crash my pit while I was winching a rock out of my ditch, I may have fucked up everything else imaginable too and I have decided we won't be discussing that particular part of this project ever.

I wouldn't bring digging up at all but this weekend our lovely and eager family was doing the new sewer line. I had so much fun making this 2 meters long ditch for the new line with a few broken ribs and mild bruises to my ego I lost my tape measurer.

I was a bit pissed with myself, so I decided to drop a kid in the ditch and take a photo so I could get a measurement when I'd find the stupid tool.

You know it's bad when you need to know how far you still have to go, and you pick a kid for the job that'll be just tall enough to make you feel better about your progress.

Anyway...



Happy Monday everybody! I'll be reporting all my fuck ups here so each of you can feel better about your own life!
Is it just me - or is your kid holding your tape measure?
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      09-13-2018, 05:33 PM   #69
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Is it just me - or is your kid holding your tape measure?
Oh shut it.

I still burst out laughing every damn time I see that pic. So fucking epic.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-13-2018, 05:35 PM   #70
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Oh shut it.

I still burst out laughing every damn time I see that pic. So fucking epic.
That made my day - thank you!
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      09-13-2018, 05:41 PM   #71
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That made my day - thank you!
That's the point of the thread! Life is so damn serious and this project is sucking a ton of effort and when I look back at this, I really want to remember that moment, and others as hilarious ones too!

Thanks for appreciating it and I hope you walk with a smile on your face for the rest of the day!
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?

Last edited by Lups; 10-04-2018 at 04:55 PM..
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      09-15-2018, 12:30 PM   #72
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Log entry number two: How not to tear down a kitchen.

All of you must know by now that I'm huge on work environment safety and hazard prevention. I got my sledge hammer back for this site after my ten year ban from that tool expired six weeks ago (my husband actually lists tool I'm banned from using, that should tell you enough about my safety record) so i, now that I'm older and smarted smuggled it in.

The guy who built the kitchen used all the nails and screwes made for the entire decade of the 60 to make sure nothing falls down. Not a joke, I swear they didn't build anything anywhere because that dude used all.

Anyway. I carried all the dishes out and all the 41 frying pans stored there in front of a 2000 euros worthy tea pot, washed them all by hand and dried them and put them to boxes and I might have gotten a teeny bit frustrated. Just a wee bit.

Since the hubby went to the basement to break some more concrete floor, I and my long lost pall hit the old kitchen.

You can take down screwes and then nicely drop the cabinets or you can start swinging, break a window and while a floor to sealing storage cabinet finally gives in, and is falling down on you, you might want to check if you remembered to wear shoes.

Anyway. I tried to take off my own head, but I I only managed to get a splinter in my toe. The sledge hammer ban was reinstated so my renovation site got a whole lot more boring again!
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-16-2018, 04:53 AM   #73
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I'm so girly.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-16-2018, 08:08 AM   #74
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I'm so girly.
Is that a scuba Diving Regulator, a tablecloth, or NBA refs shirt? I see elements of all 3.
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      09-16-2018, 08:40 AM   #75
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Originally Posted by Real Dodger View Post
Is that a scuba Diving Regulator, a tablecloth, or NBA refs shirt? I see elements of all 3.
Hand in your man card.

That's a hammer drill, jigsaw and filter for a mask.
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      09-16-2018, 09:11 AM   #76
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Hand in your man card.

That's a hammer drill, jigsaw and filter for a mask.
Wanna help me with a few more names? I know none of these in English.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-16-2018, 12:25 PM   #77
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Originally Posted by protecon View Post
Hand in your man card.

That's a hammer drill, jigsaw and filter for a mask.
Looks more like a reciprocating saw than a jigsaw. Affirm on the hammer drill (al beit a rotary hammer drill).
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Last edited by bosstones; 09-16-2018 at 12:35 PM..
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      09-16-2018, 12:30 PM   #78
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Quote:
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Hand in your man card.

That's a hammer drill, jigsaw and filter for a mask.
Wanna help me with a few more names? I know none of these in English.
Thingies?
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      09-16-2018, 12:37 PM   #79
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Wanna help me with a few more names? I know none of these in English.
I fail at learning to attach images correctly so I opted for brand differentiation:

1. Dewalt reciprocating saw
2. Bosch rotary hammer drill (the one handle can sometimes be rotated to a different position)
Attached Images
  
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      09-16-2018, 12:42 PM   #80
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Instead of remodeling the kitchen and digging a new sewer line, why not buy a nice barbecue grill and rent a port-a potty?
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      09-16-2018, 12:59 PM   #81
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Instead of remodeling the kitchen and digging a new sewer line, why not buy a nice barbecue grill and rent a port-a potty?
Ha, I like doing that basics first.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-16-2018, 01:01 PM   #82
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Thingies?
Thank you! Now that you've lost your man card, feel free to loan my lady card. I died laughing when I was packing tools I needed today and carried them out of my storage in a Victoria's secret bag. I'm probably not doing this girly thing very well either.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bosstones View Post
I fail at learning to attach images correctly so I opted for brand differentiation:

1. Dewalt reciprocating saw
2. Bosch rotary hammer drill (the one handle can sometimes be rotated to a different position)
Yeah, now I remember why I don't remember those names in English! The first one is puukkosaha in Finnish, it epically handy when you tear down old structures. The second one is an iskuporakone, that's basically a tool you put on a picture of your lady card to the wall for memories sake.

Today's entry in how to fuck up a renovation got me banned from the drill hammer (I think) site. I'm beginning to think the hubby is trying to keep me alive!


The rock saw thingy and I had a disagreement and the judge went to the tools side.
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Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
Quote:
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?

Last edited by Lups; 09-16-2018 at 01:07 PM..
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      09-16-2018, 04:14 PM   #83
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Thank you! Now that you've lost your man card, feel free to loan my lady card. I died laughing when I was packing tools I needed today and carried them out of my storage in a Victoria's secret bag. I'm probably not doing this girly thing very well either.

Yeah, now I remember why I don't remember those names in English! The first one is puukkosaha in Finnish, it epically handy when you tear down old structures. The second one is an iskuporakone, that's basically a tool you put on a picture of your lady card to the wall for memories sake.

Today's entry in how to fuck up a renovation got me banned from the drill hammer (I think) site. I'm beginning to think the hubby is trying to keep me alive!

The rock saw thingy and I had a disagreement and the judge went to the tools side.
Now I remember why I don't remember those names in Finnish!

Crap.....you have a small jack hammer, too (the thingy on the left of the pic)?!

And whose leg is that in the pic?!

If it makes you feel any better, I f'd up my shoulder somehow last week and tweaked it again yesterday. So I decided I'd rake up the lawn clippings left behind by the lawn mowing company (front & back yards) and de-thatch most of the front yard w/ a thatching rake. I have an acre lot. My shoulder loves me for it. And a mosquito snuck into the house.....and bit me 3 times while typing this.

Google Translate tells me "thatching rake" is "haikea rake" in Finnish. If I reverse translate "haikea", it tells me it means "bitter" in English. Regardless of translation correctness.....that still pretty much sums it up in my mind.
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      09-16-2018, 04:40 PM   #84
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      09-16-2018, 11:15 PM   #85
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bosstones View Post
Now I remember why I don't remember those names in Finnish!

Crap.....you have a small jack hammer, too (the thingy on the left of the pic)?!

And whose leg is that in the pic?!

If it makes you feel any better, I f'd up my shoulder somehow last week and tweaked it again yesterday. So I decided I'd rake up the lawn clippings left behind by the lawn mowing company (front & back yards) and de-thatch most of the front yard w/ a thatching rake. I have an acre lot. My shoulder loves me for it. And a mosquito snuck into the house.....and bit me 3 times while typing this.

Google Translate tells me "thatching rake" is "haikea rake" in Finnish. If I reverse translate "haikea", it tells me it means "bitter" in English. Regardless of translation correctness.....that still pretty much sums it up in my mind.
Hahahahahahahahahaaaaa, yeah, that's not the name! I'll keep calling that spiky thingy a drill hammer, it opens up the dusty site!

That'll be the "housekeeping entrance." Basically the room the dog is let in since there will be a shower for him. It'll double as a laundry room and a coat room (or what ever the fuck those are in English!).

As said, I got booted from that site. I took that pic when I was allowed to go in to show where the dogs bath thingy will be. Legs are hubby's. I'll have to apply for a whipped card because he kinda put me to my place (again).

I'm horribly sorry for you being bitten three times by that vicious beast. Not sure what to say about your other injury since it sounds like you're as smart when it comes to letting the body heal as I am.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-18-2018, 07:21 AM   #86
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I've seen some good video's starring thoes tools, obviusly minus the blade and substituting for a soft latex ..... thingy

Quote:
Originally Posted by bosstones View Post
I fail at learning to attach images correctly so I opted for brand differentiation:

1. Dewalt reciprocating saw
2. Bosch rotary hammer drill (the one handle can sometimes be rotated to a different position)
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      09-19-2018, 06:59 AM   #87
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I've seen some good video's starring thoes tools, obviusly minus the blade and substituting for a soft latex ..... thingy
I think I've seen those artistic tapes too. No mushrooms
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-19-2018, 12:15 PM   #88
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Unless u like mushrooms : That interchangeable tool set is part of the selling point
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